Weather true or not, all printings in this Blog should be considered as FICTION.
John woke up one beautiful spring day and decided this would be the perfect day for a round of golf. He knew it was a work day, but John decided that it was more important to play golf than it was to work. And after all, isn’t that what sick days are for ?
“Hello”, said John in a very weak and feeble voice, “Hello Mrs. Connors, this is John.”
“John, you sound really bad.”
” I know Mr. Connors, I feel like I’m going to vomit. I don’t think I’ll make it to work today.”
“Don’t worry about it John, there’s not much going on today, and I’d probably be paying you for doing nothing anyway. And besides, I don’t want you to have to have to vomit, making others sick too.”
“Thanks Mr. Connors.”
Mr. Connors was so nice about it that John actually felt a little bad about lying to him. John was normally very conscientious about his job, even though it was an entry level flunky job that didn’t pay much. John didn’t really like the job, but it paid some of the bills. John was working for a coffee company named Continental Coffee. Their in house motto was “Continental Coffee; the only coffee that never hits the floor.”
Continental made every imaginable brand of coffee. They had huge vats where they would grind the beans to either course, medium, fine or extra fine. Then depending on what customers had ordered, Continental would put out for example: 5,000 cans of Folgers, 5,000 cans of 8 O’clock, 5,000 cans of Maxwell House, 5,000 cans of Government Issue for the military, 5,000 cans of Cook’s, 5,000 cans of Safeway, or whatever was ordered. All the same product, the only difference was the name on the can.
John’s job was minimum wage. He put coffee cans on the conveyor belt to go down the line to be filled with whatever coffee was being put into them. Then he would sweep up whatever coffee spilled out onto the floor, dump it back in the hopper, and let the rest of the run go through.
Not exactly exciting work !
So, John called his brother-in-law Leslie and convinced him to play hooky from his job too. He and Leslie are pretty evenly matched and enjoy playing together. They headed to Hodge Park, in Kansas City, Mo. The day was perfect and the play was great. John and Leslie were having a great time together.
John looks behind him and there stands his boss Mr. Connors.
“I thought you were sick? Didn’t you say you thought you were so sick we were afraid you were going to vomit ? ”
John swallowed hard. Thought to himself (What the heck), and replied to Mr. Connors,
“That’s right. Just the thought of going to work today made me want to puke. !”
John started looking for his new job that very afternoon. Right after he finished his round and his 19th hole activities.
Not working today
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